The funniest skateboard jokes ever

June 9, 2020 | Skateboarding
Skateboarding: there are plenty of jokes involving skateboarders | Photo: Shutterstock

It was a tough search, but we have finally gathered the greatest, funniest, and most extensive collection of skateboard jokes.

Everyone knows that the hardest thing in skateboarding is concrete. But we'll make life lighter and less painful for you.

We have curated the most comprehensive list of jokes involving skaters, skateparks, boards, and wheels.

There's classic skateboarding jokes, puns, riddles, and humorous one-liners for all tastes and ages.

Our hand-selected list of gags are clean and safe for kids and will get any skateboarder giggling. Are you ready to laugh out loud?

Skateboarders: laughing is always easier than hitting concrete | Photo: Shutterstock

60 Hilarious Skateboard Jokes

What's the hardest trick in skateboarding? Getting a job.

Don't fall off a skateboard with a guitar. You could break your neck.

What's Tony Hawk's power level? It's over 900.

Did you see that guy wearing a turban and doing tricks at the skatepark? Sure, dude. It was Sikh.

How many skateboarders does it take to change a light bulb? Three - one to do it, another one to film it, and one more to say, "That was sick, man!"

Why did the skateboard go to the movie? Because it was wheely board.

Today, on my way to work, I hit a guy riding a skateboard. On a lighter note, I'm selling a lightly used skateboard.

Believe it or not, my skateboarding career and Jon Snow have a lot in common. They both ended with an Ollie.

What do skateboarders do when they're really talented? They GoPro.

What is the hardest thing in skateboarding? Concrete.

What time is it when an elephant stands on your skateboard? It's time to buy a new skateboard.

I saw a ginger friend of mine skateboarding in shorts and a tank top.
"How he wasn't cold?" I asked him.
"It doesn't get cold," he replied.
And then I remembered that since he's ginger, he doesn't have a soul to warm.

What does Marty McFly skate on that also cleans his carpet? A hoover board.

If I ever tell my father I want to be a professional skateboarder, heelflip!

What does a cannibal call a skateboarder? Fast food meals on wheels.

I lost my skateboard when I fell off. For a moment, I couldn't find it, but then it hit me.

Remember when radical extremists were just kids pulling sick stunts off on their skateboards? Gnarly.

What are the most common skaters' last words? "Hey, dude. Watch this!"

How many skateboarders does it take to open a jar lid? Only one, but it takes 50 tries.

I took my skateboard around my friend's house.
"Wanna see me kickflip?" I asked.
"No..." he sighed.
He really regrets naming his dog "Flip".

Why do recreational skaters watch Street League Skateboarding (SLS)? To see how the pros wear beanies.

What is a gang member's favorite skateboard trick? The Crip flip.

Donald Trump should take up skateboarding. He flips some sick 180s.

Honey, are you a mountaintop skateboard race? Because there's you with those curves, and me with no brakes.

You either love skateboarding, or you're wrong.

Nothing can stop skateboarders. Well, except pebbles.

A hipster drowned yesterday. He went ice skateboarding before it was cool.

How does a skateboarder deliver his message? By Air Mail.

Did you hear about the skater who broke his elbow? It was rather humerus.

"Sir, your balance is outstanding."
"I know my balance is outstanding because I've been skating for years, but I fail to see how that's going to help me pay back this debt."

What does a Soviet skateboarder praise a fellow rider? "That's comradical, bro!"

What do you call a Chinese skateboarder? Co-Ping.

"I really want to learn how to do skateboard tricks," a father tells his son.
"Pop, shove it," the kid replies.

What do you call a pro skater who just broke up with his girlfriend? Homeless.

I tried skateboarding to work, but I almost drowned. I'm a fisherman.

How do you know that frogs are skateboarding fans? They're always saying "rip it," "rip it."

Where do you learn to skate? In a boarding school.

What do you call a whiney skateboarder that got famous? Moany Hawk.

My best friend busted his knee while skateboarding. That must have hurt wheel bad.

Who was skateboarders' favorite boxer? Muhammad Ollie.

Three men die and arrive at the pearly white gates of heaven.
St. Peter, the keeper of the keys to the kingdom, says: "Depending on how loyal you were to your wife, you will be awarded a vehicle."
The first man, visibly nervous, steps up and says: "I have been with my wife for 15 years, and I cheated on her four times."
So doing what he said, St. Peter gives him a pick-up truck to drive the rest of the way to heaven.
The second man, slightly tense, steps up and says: "I have been with my wife for 25 years and only cheated on her once."
So again, doing what he said, St. Peter gives him a sports car.
Finally, the third man steps up and says: "I've been with my wife for 40 years and never cheated on her once."
St. Peter gives the final man a high-performance race car.
The three men then drive off to heaven, and the guy in the race car pulls over right before they cross across the bridge.
The guys in the other cars pull over and ask him what's wrong.
The man starts crying and says: "I've been with my wife for 40 years and never cheated on her. I just saw her riding a skateboard."

Tony Hawk changed skateboarding forever with that 900. We could say it was revolutionary.

What does a doctor normally say to skateboarders? You're sick.

Why did the plank go to the movie? Because it was board.

What do you call a skater with green skin and a long nose? An ollie-gator.

What's the difference between skateboard tricks and my political views? None - people call them "sick" and "radical".

Professional skateboarding is a half-pipe dream.

What do you call a skater who likes Starbucks? A coffee grinder.

What do you call a communist on a skateboard? A radical leftist.

How many old school skateboarders does it take to open a bag of chips? Just one, but he'll complain about how much better the "good old" ones were, and it'll take him about 20 tries.

Oh, glorious asphalt, tell me your secrets.

Last night, my friend and I were skating on his back patio.
His dad was sitting outside, watching us.
My friend's board fell off his board and yelled: "Ahh, my knee!"
To this, his dad replied, "Was it your low knee or your high knee?"

What do babies wear when they go skateboarding? Mini-Vans.

What's Mike Vallely's favorite kind of chicken? Boneless.

What do you call something that gave up being a small body of running water to pursue a career in professional skateboarding? An ex-stream.

How do you radicalize someone? Buy them a skateboard.

My best friend says I can't go skateboarding with a broken bone. But I'm going out on a limb and do it anyway.

Why don't skateboarders shop at Big Lots? Because they've always preferred Ollie's.

How many vert skaters does it take to change a light bulb? One. But they have to wear knee and elbow pads, and wrist guards.

What do trance music scene and skateboarders have in common? They all hate Scooter fans.